31 Things I've Learned in 31 years (more or less)

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I turned 31...recently. I'm not sure what's scarier about being in my thirties: the fact that it's really not that bad or the fact that I really don't care how bad it is. I suppose part of me is still loyal to twenty-one-year-old-Sarah, who would have been appalled at the state of my belly-hiding mumus-I-mean-swimsuits. But that baby Sarah hadn't pushed three children out of her vagina like a superhero SO WHAT DID SHE KNOW?

What Was I Saying? 

Just like I remember the ten most important grocery items that I forgot to add to my cart as soon as I complete my online grocery shopping order, I will remember things I forgot on this list as soon as I hit publish. Also, there are probably a lot of things that I should've learned by now, like how to unclog a toilet (sorry, honey).

You have undoubtedly learned some great lessons, too, in however many years you've been on this planet, so share this post with YOUR top lessons--feel free to match your age, too, or just pick your favorites.

Women Are SMART

I am asking you to share unashamedly for two reasons: 1) more eyeballs on Stand for Mom (blogging ain't cheap, yo, click my affiliate links and buy some nail polish) and 2) women are really smart (see #22) and wouldn't it be cool if a bunch of us were sharing our collective wisdom all in one place? WOULDN'T THAT BE A LOT OF WISDOM? 

This Is the Best Stuff I Know: 

1. A late start is a perfect way to start.  

2. "Because it makes me happy" is a good reason for doing something. 

3. Getting stronger in one place makes me want to get stronger in another place.

4. A walk around the block is better than coffee (JUST KIDDING but it’s close).

5. God moves both more slowly and more quickly than I expect him to.

6. Using a bad word isn’t a sin. Not forgiving somebody is.

7. Umami is a thing and it’s wonderful.

8. Anybody who promises to make you rich in six months IS LYING TO YOUR FACE and however old you are you are TOO OLD FOR THAT.

9. If you don’t have a good mom, you can be a good mom. That’s what freedom means.

10. My marriage belongs to ME. My husband impacts its quality and has a say in whether or not it continues, but ultimately it’s my relationship and my own happiness that I’m nourishing or sabotaging.

11. Unexpressed anger kills me slowly from the inside. I have to choose to express it, feel it wholly, and then release it.

12. My vulnerability gives somebody else permission to be vulnerable.

13. I like my kids a lot more when I get regular breaks from them.

14. I will clear everything for a friend date.

15. It is both humbling and gratifying to meet somebody a world away who has the same dreams and hopes that you do.

16. Feminism is beautiful but I have to pair it with forgiveness or I just walk around angry all the time and then the patriarchy wins.

17. Take your own polish in the perfect shade of pink (or this delicious ultra violet) and the Sally Hansen Miracle Gel Top Coat (the black bottle) to the nail salon. A polish only is about $7 and sit under the light for 10-15 minutes. Your manicure will last a week and it took you all of twenty minutes and about $7. You’re welcome. Tip your manicurist.

18. Don’t buy something if you can’t afford to replace it.

19. Shame is at the root of a lot of things.

20. My life’s calling is freedom, but the actual point of freedom isn’t to be able to do more stuff (though that happens and it’s awesome), it’s to feel God’s love more.

21. Success is being loved by God and loving him.

22. Women are f*cking incredible. (and here and here)

23. My job isn’t to be my kids’ everything; it’s to point them to the Everything.

24. You never regret taking the photos. You always regret not being in the photos.

25. Lube is clutch.

26. Man does not live by bread alone but she DOES live by bread.

27. If you pray for the same person every time you brush your teeth, in one year you’ll have prayed for that person over 300 times. You can also do this when you get into the car, take a shower, or any other thing you do regularly.

28. If you deliberately start taking your angry feelings when you’re doing the dishes and turn them into prayers thanking God for dishes to feed your children off of, one day you’ll find yourself randomly praising God while you do the dishes.

29. Doing less for my kids allows me to do more with them later.

30. The wonderful thing about privilege is that it’s a platform and you can pull other people up onto it so their voices can be heard, too.  

31.  Queso is cheaper than therapy.

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PS I don't need fewer bad things, I need a bigger god here and what I learned from A Wrinkle in Time here